Pirates of the Carob-Bean

I wish my daughter were old enough to appreciate all of the pirate hype going on right now, because that would probably make it much easier to get her to wear her eye patch. After being diagnosed with a mild case of strabismus (or lazy eye, to use the relatively benign but nonetheless mama-irritating vernacular), M. was instructed to wear a patch over her stronger eye for 2-3 hours a day. Or more accurately, her parents were instructed to convince a headstrong two-year-old that putting a large sticker over her eye and leaving it on for extended periods of time would be fun fun fun.

So far, our success has been mixed. I followed some advice I read online and ordered a few different types of patches in patterns I thought she would like - namely: ladybugs, stars and princess crowns - so she can pick out what she wants to wear. If we can make it all the way to the patch-picking, we're pretty much set. The problem comes when we ask her to choose an "eye sticker" and she just flat out says no, she's not putting one on. If she's determined not to wear one, there's really nothing we can do. Even if we wanted to wrestle her to the floor, forcefully close her eye and accurately position a very sticky piece of medical adhesive to her face, she'd pull the little sucker off the minute we let her go.

I guess there are those who would argue that we need to assert our authority and superior judgment and just make her wear the dang thing regardless, employing harsh punishments and minor acts of torture as needed, but I'm really trying to avoid turning this into an Amnesty International case. Some days she wears the patch for 3 hours, some days she wears it for half an hour, some days not at all. I figure that the pediatric opthamologists factor this level of compliance into their recommendations in the first place, just like the dietitians who tell us to eat 5 servings of vegetables a day in the hopes that we'll manage 2-3. I'm trying to believe that we're teaching her about taking responsibility for her own health, that her body is a relevant source of information. And that girl pirates are super cool.